Rumble in the Jungle
by leener
Summary: Men are from Mars, Women are from the Plateau...See what happens in this battle of the sexes!


"Rumble in the Jungle"

By Leener

Disclaimer: None of these characters belong to me, just borrowing for fun.

Set in Season 4, Malone and Finn both included. Just a fun little story I wrote for a contest, enjoy everyone!

"Margueriteeeeeeeee!"

Marguerite looked over the top of the book she was reading and watched Roxton stomp into the main room clutching his favorite blue striped shirt. "Marguerite!--Oh, there you are. Why am I not surprised to find you lounging about instead of mending my shirt? You promised you would have it finished by now!"

Marguerite shut her book and got up from her chair. "I have been working on the mending all week. It isn't my fault you boys can't keep from going a day without ruining your clothes! I am relaxing right now, so that means I'm not working. If you don't want to wait, you're more than welcome to pick up a needle and thread and mend your shirt yourself. If not, then you'll just have to wait." She sat back down and opened her book. "Do you mind? You are blocking my light."

"I do mind, Marguerite. I need this shirt finished." He threw the shirt in her lap and started to walk away.

"Do I look like your servant, Lord Roxton! I told you I wasn't going to do it right now!"

"Marguerite, it's your responsibility to the mending, not mine!"

Marguerite threw the shirt on the table. "And I told _you_, I'd do it later. If you don't want to wait, that's your problem. Like I said you're more than welcome to do it yourself, there are the sewing materials right there on the table. Now, if you don't mind, I'd like to get back to my book."

"This is absolutely ridiculous, Marguerite! You surely don't expect me to sew!"

"And why not?"

"Because it's a wo--because I can't sew."

Marguerite raised an eyebrow and tilted her head. "What was that, Lord Roxton? Do you think I didn't catch that? You were going to say it's a woman's job, weren't you!"

"I wasn't going to say that."

"Oh yes you were--"

Veronica and Malone came into the main room at the sound of the raised voices. "What's going on in here?" Veronica asked.

"Oh Veronica, good." Marguerite waved for Veronica to come over. "Come listen to what Lord Roxton has to say about women."

Veronica walked over and stood next to Marguerite with her arms crossed. "What does Roxton have to say about women?"

"Apparently, he thinks that it's the women's job to do the sewing around here. A man can't be troubled with stuff like that."

Malone laughed as he walked over and stood next to Roxton. "Well, he's right. You certainly don't expect us to sew. That's a woman's job."

Veronica and Marguerite's eyes grew large as they stared in disbelief at the men. "I can't believe I'm hearing this, especially from you Ned." Veronica looked angrily at Malone.

"Come on, Veronica. Women are supposed to take care of the home while the men do all the hard stuff."

"Why you--" Marguerite was about to lunge at Malone but Veronica held her back. "I'll have you know that plenty of the fine gowns that I bought in London were made by men, not women! There are plenty of men who sew for a living and there's nothing wrong with that. And second of all, we are not your servants, buster, nor are we frail. We don't need to be locked away while the men do all the 'hard' work!"

Veronica felt safe enough to let go of Marguerite, but she kept an eye on her to make sure she didn't go after Malone again. "I agree with Marguerite. Just because we're women doesn't mean our duty is only to house and home, we're just as strong as men."

"Veronica, I have no doubt that you and Marguerite are both capable women, but there are just some things that women are meant to do, and some things that men are meant to do. That's the way it's always been, and will be." Roxton crossed his arms and nodded at Malone as if he was finished arguing.

Challenger came up the stairs with Finn trailing behind him. Unfortunately for him, he chose the wrong time to ask what was for lunch.

"What's for lunch! Lunch! What, you want us to do your sewing and cooking as well! MEN!" Marguerite glared daggers at Challenger as she walked by him to the balcony.

Challenger looked confusedly at the others. "What did I say?"

Finn reached the top of the steps just in time to see Marguerite storm by. "What's got her worked up?"

"You know what you said, Challenger." Veronica walked over to Finn and grabbed her by the arm and start pulling her towards the balcony. "Come with me, Finn. You don't need to hear it from these _men_."

Challenger walked over to Roxton and Malone. "What is going on here? Why are Veronica and Marguerite upset with me?"

"It's not your fault, old boy." Roxton clapped Challenger on the back. "You were just at the wrong place at the wrong time."

"Yeah, we were arguing with the women. They wanted us to start sewing. Can you believe that?" Malone laughed.

"What? What else happened?" Challenger asked.

"_WHAT! Let me at 'em! I'll show Mr. Writer who's weak around here!"_ Roxton and Malone stopped explaining at the sound of Finn's raised voice. The men looked over in the direction of the balcony and could hear Marguerite and Veronica talking in hushed tones.

"It probably isn't wise to upset the women. We do all live here, and we don't want tensions to be constantly high." Challenger glanced at the balcony and noticed the women were coming back inside and they didn't look like they had calmed down any. "Perhaps it's best you apologize for whatever you said to them boys." Challenger whispered.

"Are you kidding? I'm not going to apologize." Malone looked over at Roxton and he nodded his head in agreement.

"If we give in here, who knows what will come next. I'm sorry, Challenger. But I am not going to start sewing."

"What a coincidence, Roxton, because I'm not going to sew either. None of us are going to do any work around here until you boys admit that women are not inferior to men." Marguerite stood next to Veronica and Finn and they all looked like they meant business.

"Come now, ladies. I'm sure you don't want to do that." Challenger stepped in to play peacekeeper hoping he could keep another battle from ensuing.

"Figures you'd side with the men." Marguerite scoffed.

"Marguerite, I'm not siding with anyone, but surely you must see that you ladies are being unreasonable. You have always had your tasks to do, just as we have. Why try to change everything now?"

"I'm surprised at you, Challenger." Veronica placed her hands on her hips. "I'm surprised at all of you."

"Yeah, we're gonna duel this out, a battle of the sexes. You'll see that women aren't weaker than men." Finn crossed her arms as well and put her game face on.

"Battle of the Sexes? You want to fight us?" Malone asked.

"I'm not entirely sure that's what we had in mind," Veronica smiled and winked at Marguerite and Finn.

"You wanna fight? I could so whip your butt, come on let's go!" An energetic Finn put up her fists and started hopping up and down.

"Calm down, Finn. You'll get your chance." Marguerite looked back at the men. "Well?"

Roxton looked at Challenger and Malone and saw they were as confused as he was. "Well, what?"

Marguerite sighed impatiently. "A competition to prove which sex is better. We can have several events and we can even have a judge, we were thinking of having Assai coming out and judging for us."

"Of course you'd want Assai to judge, she's a woman! That's not fair!" Malone pointed his finger at Marguerite. "I bet that was your idea, that's cheating!"

"Who you callin' a cheater?" Finn prepared to charge him and Malone jumped back.

Veronica grabbed Finn by the arm and pulled her back. "Fine, we can have Assai _and_ Jarl judge, happy?"

"Are we sure we really want to do this?" Challenger asked.

"What's the matter? Chicken? Bawk, bawk, bawk, bawk." Finn started flapping her arms and egging the men on.

"You're on!" Roxton and Malone said in unison.

"Ok," Veronica said, "I'll head over to the Zanga village tomorrow and ask Assai and Jarl to stay with us for a while until we settle this."

"Why don't we make things more interesting?" They all looked at Marguerite and could see she was planning something.

"What did you have in mind?" Roxton didn't like the look in her eyes, but he had to find out what she was thinking.

"Let's say whoever loses this competition, takes over the tasks of the opposite sex for two weeks."

"What, you mean like switching tasks?" Malone asked.

"No, my dear Ned, you do your tasks, and the other side's as well."

Everyone's jaws dropped at Marguerite's proposal. Finn and Veronica started whispering but she stopped them. "She better know what she's doing," Veronica whispered to Finn.

"Come on, Vee, we could beat those guys easy. We don't have to worry."

"Finn's right, Veronica. We know that these boys can't do anything without a woman telling them how. So what do you say boys? You man enough to take the bet?" Marguerite grinned and waited for them to accept.

Roxton looked uneasily at Malone and Challenger. They didn't want to risk betting something so big. Their own responsibilities were trying enough, but to take on the tasks of the women on top of theirs was enough to make them doubt themselves. But they didn't have a choice, they couldn't back out. "Fine, you've got yourself a deal."

"Good. We'll see you boys tomorrow, then we can start." They all met in the center and shook hands. "May the best sex win." The woman and men split and went to their respective areas and waited until tomorrow for the festivities to begin.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

The next day, Veronica had left early to summon Assai and Jarl so by the time everyone was finished eating breakfast, they were ready and waiting for the first event to take place.

"Veronica explained to Jarl and myself on the way here that you need our help to solve a certain matter. You want us to judge something?" Assai asked.

"That's right, Assai. You see we women want to show the men that we are not weaker than they are, so we are going to have a couple of little competitions to show who's really the superior sex." Marguerite explained.

"Oh, I see," Assai looked slowly at each of the men. "You think women are weak?" Jarl saw the look in her eye and made sure not to say a word, he was a judge and there was no reason to get lumped in with the rest of the men. Unlike the explorers, he knew when to keep his mouth shut.

"Yeah, they think we can't take care of ourselves and need a big man to watch over us. I've been taking care of myself since I was a kid. Same goes for Vee and Marguerite. _These_ guys," she pointed at the three men who prepared themselves for another argument, "practically said that women should stick to doing housework and leave the guys to do the challenging stuff."

"Come on, let's not start this again. Men do not sew, that's a woman's job. You know, making pretty little dresses and things like that." Malone laughed. "I mean how hard can it be? You don't do the kind of things that men have to do. Now, _that_ is hard work."

At Malone's words, all of the women's eyes met and smiles grew on their faces. "You're right, Malone," Veronica grinned, "it's not hard at all. I think we just found our first competition."

"Oh," Malone stopped laughing and looked at Veronica, "what's that?"

"Dress making." The women said in agreement.

Roxton smacked Malone upside the head. "You just _had_ to open your mouth. You better know how to make a dress, Malone."

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Challenger looked flustered. This mess didn't involve him, he would have rather been in his lab performing his experiments. This wouldn't have happened if he hadn't have let Finn convince him to come up for lunch. Now he was in a sewing competition and he was being used as the dummy. He looked down at himself and couldn't believe that when this was finished, he would be wearing a dress.

The explorers had found some left over fabric in the storage room from when they visited the Hagans. The queen had been very generous in giving them supplies for helping the village. The material was the same that was used to make the royal gowns, so it was too fancy to be used for regular jungle garb, it was, however, the perfect material to make a dress with. The women jumped at the chance to finally be able to use it while Roxton and Malone laughed as they pictured Challenger in a bright blue dress.

To make matters fair, since Marguerite could sew circles around anyone in the tree house and the men had never picked up a needle and thread, she was the dummy on the girl's side. Both teams had split up and were stationed in separate areas of the tree house. Marguerite's bedroom and Challenger's lab were the hot spots. They had only two days to complete their dresses so when everyone wasn't busy doing their chores or other necessities like eating or sleeping, they were all at their battle stations.

Marguerite was standing on a chair while Veronica and Finn worked around her.

"Ouch! Finn if you poke me with that needle one more time, your fingers won't even be able to grip it when I get done with you!" Marguerite rubbed her arm while she glared at Finn.

"I'm sorry, Marguerite. I'm doin' the best I can. If it makes you feel any better, I've poked myself way more than I have you." Finn stuck her sore finger in her mouth and hoped the pain would go away.

"Well, you just watch the needle, missy. I'm not a pin cushion."

Veronica took out the several pins that were in her mouth, "Marguerite, would you stop fidgeting. I can't work if you keep moving."

Marguerite stood still and sighed. "Well, tell your shadow to stop poking the hell out of me. I swear if I were to drink a glass of water right now, it would leak out of me!"

"Come on, Marguerite. We're almost done and the deadline is in a couple of hours. I just wonder how the boys are doing."

"They're probably too tangled in fabric to know which side is up." The three women had a laugh good at the men and then went right back to work.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -- - - - - -

"Challenger, you look beautiful! All you need is the hat and shoes to match." Roxton and Malone chuckled at the sight Challenger made.

"Laugh now while you can, because you will never see this again." Challenger pouted and looked at himself in the mirror. "Oh, if the people from the London Zoological Society could see me now. I wouldn't blame them for calling me crazy. Well," he sighed, "let's get on with my humiliation."

They finished their 'dress' just in time for the deadline. Roxton and Malone made their way to the main room while Challenger waited in the lab until the official unveiling. Marguerite stayed in her room as well while Veronica and Finn went upstairs to meet Assai and Jarl.

"Is everyone ready?" Assai asked.

"Yes." They all answered.

"The men look most confident." Jarl smiled but immediately wiped it off his face when he saw the look Assai gave him. "Of course I'm sure the women will do just fine." Jarl let out his breath when Assai stopped giving him the evil eye and told the women to let Marguerite come up.

Veronica went downstairs to fetch Marguerite leaving Finn to taunt the men. "I can't wait to see Challenger in a dress. Well, whatever you made that would pass as a dress." Finn laughed at her own joke and saw she succeeded in wiping the arrogant look off the boys' faces.

Marguerite came up the stairs and walked in the main room slowly. She had a smirk on her face as she modeled her dress. She looked beautiful and she knew it. Even though she hadn't sewn it herself, Veronica already knew a bit about sewing and with some lessons to Finn, her sewing stopped looking as if she had used her feet instead of her hands. Marguerite's light blue gown fit perfectly in exactly all the right places. She had picked some of her best jewels to accent her dress and Veronica and Finn had fixed her hair up.

She made her way back to stand next to Veronica and Finn and stared at the open-mouthed faces of Roxton and Malone. "Yo-You made that," Malone pointed at Marguerite's dress, "in two days?"

"You certainly look beautiful in it, Marguerite." Roxton stared admiringly at Marguerite and smiled.

"Why thank you, Lord Roxton." She looked over at Veronica and Finn and winked.

Malone elbowed Roxton in the ribs, "She's the enemy remember?"

Roxton rubbed his ribs and nodded at Malone.

Assai and Jarl both looked at Marguerite's dress with approval. "Very nice work," Assai said. She turned to the men. "You may bring Challenger up now."

Malone ran down the stairs to the lab to get Challenger and came back up a minute later. "Presenting, Professor Challenger!" Malone waved his arm and everyone stared at the doorway waiting for his appearance. After a couple moments, Malone laughed nervously. "I _said_, presenting, Professor Challenger!" He said it a little louder this time and looked anxiously at the doorway.

Roxton went down the stairs and everyone could hear him whispering persistently with Challenger. Roxton came back up and looked at the women. "He said he'll come up, but you have to promise not to laugh."

"No way bucko! If our dress had sucked, you guys would have laughed your butts off!"

Marguerite looked at Finn and smiled. "She's right, now tell George to get his gorgeous self up here."

Veronica glanced at Assai. Assai nodded and turned to Roxton and Malone. "If Professor Challenger does not show us his dress, I will be forced to declare the women the victors."

Roxton and Malone looked at each other, "Challenger!" they shouted simultaneously.

Challenger peeked his head through the door frame and saw everyone was ready and waiting for him. He sighed and muttered to himself. "The things I do for friendship."

As soon as he stepped in the room, he heard several whistles. He started to turn around and go back down the stairs, but Roxton and Malone grabbed an arm each and walked him back to everybody.

"Challenger, you look lovely. That color certainly brings out the blue in your eyes." Marguerite and the other ladies started laughing.

Challenger's face turned red. "Can we just get on with this please?"

"You guys call that a dress?" Finn pointed at Challenger. "That looks more like a quilt than anything. A really bad quilt. Why are there so many pieces? Haven't you guys ever seen a dress?"

Veronica shushed Finn. "Now, now, Finn. Let's not make them feel bad. I'm sure they already feel _foolish,_" she emphasized that word while looking at them, "for underestimating how hard it is to sew."

Marguerite shook her head. "Honestly boys, I'm disappointed. I can see the stitches on every patch from this side of the room. How much thread did you waste?"

"Hey, come on, we did our best. We've never sewed anything before." Malone looked at the dress Challenger was modeling. "I think we did all right, if I say so myself."

"Please, can we just declare the women the winners so I can get out of this please? We all know this thing I'm wearing is hideous and no where close to being a dress." Assai and Jarl looked sympathetically at Challenger.

"We have made our decision. In the first competition of successfully making a dress, we declare the women the winners." Assai looked at the women and smiled. "Congratulations."

Marguerite, Veronica, and Finn all smiled at Assai and Jarl and nodded their thanks. "Not so easy when you're on the other side, eh boys?" Finn stuck her tongue out at them.

"Grow up, Finn." Malone rolled his eyes. "And you just wait until the next competition, we will win that one!"

Malone and Finn were standing nose to nose arguing while Veronica tried to keep them apart. Roxton had found his way to Marguerite's side and was giving her several compliments on her dress.

"While you argue over who's better, I'm getting out of this!" Challenger practically ran down to his lab leaving the women to gloat and celebrate over their first victory.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Another day started with everyone eager for the new competition. After eating breakfast, everyone gathered at the base of the tree house for Jarl to announce the next event. "For your next task, you will go hunting. You will have two hours to go find any game that you wish, but you must have it back here before your two hours are up. The side with the largest amount and most importantly, edible kills, will win. Are there any questions?"

They all shook their heads.

"All right then," Jarl looked at the position of the sun in the sky. "As soon as you all are ready, we can begin."

"We're ready, and we're going to win this! Hunting is a man's sport. We have Roxton, his job is to hunt! Get ready to lose ladies!" Malone laughed and smirked in triumph.

Finn cleared her throat. "Sorry to burst your bubble, man, but did ya forget who the women of this tree house are? Vee is like the best tracker on this plateau and can hit anything with her knife. Me," Finn whipped out her crossbow, "I'm deadly with this. And as for Marguerite, you've all seen her hit even small targets with her pistol. So I wouldn't start braggin' just yet."

"Don't bother with them, Finn," Veronica checked her knives and put them back in place, "they always underestimate women."

"Excuse me, we do not!" Roxton shouted.

"Oh really?" Marguerite wore a look of shock. "Let's see if I can refresh your memories. I remember an encounter with a group of women who were clad in leather, I'm sure that'll spark your memories fairly fast, the Voodoo tart, and you underestimated all three of us."

"And when did we do that?" Roxton asked.

"When you first met me, Lord Roxton, you assumed that I was a defenseless woman who shouldn't be in the Amazon because I would hurt myself. As you have seen, I don't need protection. And when you first met Veronica, you all assumed she was a mindless savage even though she had just saved Malone's life. And we all know how you all treated Finn. Poor girl from the future who can't even read, you've all treated her as if she's a naïve child." Marguerite looked at her two friends and back at the boys. "Well, we're done talking, let's go hunting."

Roxton, Malone, and Challenger just watched them walk away because they didn't have a thing to say. They told Jarl they were ready to start and they all set out.

"Remember," Assai called out, "you only have two hours!"

An hour and a half later…..

"Shouldn't we start to head back Roxton? Jarl said he had to have our kills before the two hours was up." Challenger pulled out his pocket watch. "I would say we have just enough time to get back, after all, we did travel farther out than usual."

"But it was worth it. Look at all the stuff we got!" Malone looked enthusiastically at Roxton and Challenger. "We have those women beat for sure!"

"I don't know, Malone. Now that I think of it, they were right. We do underestimate them, they are all capable hunters. We just think that because we do all the hunting and they never do, that we're better at it. I bet they've caught just as much as we have. But you're right Challenger, it's time to start heading back. Hopefully what we've caught is enough."

- - - - - - - - - - -

"Awwww Marguerite, you let it get away!" Finn threw her hands into the air and watched the boar they had been tracking run off into the jungle.

"That's the fifth piece of game that we've lost. If we don't catch anything soon, we're going to return back with barely anything. I don't think a tiny bird is going to win this for us." Veronica sighed. "Come on, let's go see if we can catch up with it."

"Ok, Vee. Marguerite, can ya shoot it next time?"

"Ok, I've had it! Stop blaming this all on me, Finn! What's wrong with your crossbow? I haven't seen you shoot one thing either. I thought you were 'deadly' with it." Marguerite scoffed and glared at Finn.

"There ain't nothin' wrong with my crossbow. It isn't my fault they all run away before I can get a shot off." Finn pulled out her crossbow. "And I am deadly with this. I could hit anything."

Marguerite rolled her eyes at her arrogance. "I'll believe that when I see it. And as for the game being scared away, it's because you can't keep your mouth shut! They can hear you coming a mile away! 'Vee, what tracks are those! Vee, where'd it go? Vee, are we close?' Honestly, and you wonder why they run away."

Finn pouted and looked down. "I'm not that loud."

Veronica stepped in between them. "Hey, can we stop fighting amongst ourselves please? We're still on the hunt. Now, I found tracks of some raptors, and they're fresh, so keep your eyes open."

"Speaking of…" Finn pointed her crossbow over Veronica's shoulder and fired but missed. Veronica and Marguerite turned and saw the raptor Finn tried to fire at. "Shoot it, Marguerite!" Veronica shouted as she threw one of her daggers. The raptor started to charge and her dagger flew right by. "Marguerite!"

"I'm trying, but the bloody thing is jammed!" Marguerite repeatedly pulled the trigger but nothing was happening. "Come on, fire damn it!" The raptor charged closer. Finn reloaded her crossbow to take another shot as Veronica pulled out her two knives that she kept sheathed behind her back.

They both stopped when they heard several gunshots in succession. Veronica and Finn both looked from the dead raptor back at Marguerite. "Well, I got it to work. And now we have a dead raptor."

"Yeah, but it's full of more holes than Swiss cheese. Geez, Marguerite, how many times did you shoot it?"

"At least I shot it, Finn." Marguerite put her pistol back in her holster.

Finn stuck her tongue out while Marguerite rolled her eyes. "If you're done, children," Veronica interrupted, "we need to salvage whatever we can from this and start back. Our time's almost up." All three women bent over and got to work.

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

After the men and the women assembled at the base of the tree house, Jarl and Assai took what both sides brought back to determine who won the hunting competition. After a couple of minutes, Jarl and Assai were ready to announce their decision.

"In the short amount of time you had to hunt," Jarl began, "both teams were successful in bringing back plenty. However, after we took a look at the raptor meat the women brought back, we were not able to count it towards your total."

"Why the bloody hell not!" Marguerite asked.

"Well, if you remember correctly Marguerite, the task was to bring back the most meat, however, I said it had to be edible. The raptor meat was full of several holes and severely damaged, not edible at all. I'm sorry ladies. But Assai and myself are announcing the men as the winners. But both sides performed extremely well." Jarl walked over and shook the hands of Roxton, Malone, and Challenger.

"We coulda won if you hadn't shot the thing so many times," Finn crossed her arms and looked sideways at Marguerite.

"I told you, the bloody gun jammed! Get off my case, Finn! You know you're lucky you're on my side." Finn saw the look on Marguerite's face and immediately shut up.

After congratulating the men, Assai walked over to the sulking women. "Do not worry, you will win in the end and show those men we are not weak. You would have won if that meat didn't have so many bullet holes in it. I'm sorry." Assai smiled at them and patted Veronica's shoulder. "Do not worry, you will win tomorrow. Have faith."

"Looks like we're even now," Malone said as he walked over with Challenger and Roxton following behind him.

"For now, we'll get you guys tomorrow. As the saying goes, 'Girls rule, boys drool.'" Finn stuck her tongue out at Malone.

"And what's that supposed to mean?" Roxton asked.

"It means, don't let your one victory go to your head. See you on the battlefield boys." Marguerite nodded to Veronica and Finn and they made their way to the elevator.

"You know, I don't think I'll ever figure them out," Malone stood there staring after them.

"They're women, Malone," Challenger laughed as he heartily clapped him on the back, "you're not meant to understand them. I've been married to my Jessie for years and I still don't understand her. Nature didn't intend for it to be that way. We can just marvel at their complexity."

Roxton laughed. "Half the fun is in trying. Well, come on, let's get up and see what is in store for us next." After the elevator came back down, they all climbed in and waited for the elevator to take them up to the tree house.

"All right, now that we are all here, we can start the next event." Assai signaled for the men to come closer. "For your next event, you will cook whatever it was that you caught hunting. Each of you will have to make a separate dish. You can help each other, but you may not cook the meal for the other person. I know some of you are not the best cooks, so Jarl and I will be watching to make sure there is none of that happening."

Without consciously knowing it, everyone's eyes shifted to Marguerite and Challenger. It was no secret that both of them weren't the best of cooks. Marguerite defensively crossed her arms. "I'm not that desperate, I am not going to cheat so stop looking at me."

"Nor I," Challenger realized he was disadvantaged when it came to cooking, but he wasn't going to handicap himself early on by thinking negatively. "Let's get started."

Since there wasn't enough room in the kitchen for everyone, they all took turns cooking their meals. It was decided to let the ladies go first. Veronica and Finn decided to let Marguerite cook her food first so that they could both help her and get it out of the way. They chose something simple so hopefully she wouldn't be able to ruin it. They decided on raptor soup. It wasn't the actually cooking where Marguerite had trouble, it was the seasoning. Since Veronica or Finn couldn't touch the actual ingredients, only suggest, it would be hard for them to help Marguerite. Marguerite's definition of a pinch was at least two to three times bigger than Veronica or Finn's. At the end of a lot of frustration, Marguerite had made her meal without burning down the tree house. All they could do was hope it was good enough.

Veronica and Finn each took their turn in the kitchen, with Marguerite knowing they didn't need any of her help. Finn didn't have any cooking experience when she first came to the plateau since there was no reason for her to cook in the future. But after a couple of lessons from Veronica, Finn picked it up fast. Finn made her meal using the small bird they had caught. She baked it and added some vegetables on the side from the garden. After she finished, Veronica used the left over raptor meat to make a roast. She lightly seasoned it and added some vegetables on the side which she also roasted.

After the women cleared out of the kitchen, the men took their turns. With Challenger, Roxton and Malone had to remind him that cooking was not one of his experiments where he just added everything into a bowl, mixed it together, and sat back to watch it react. After several tries, Challenger made his raptor stew and stepped aside for Roxton and Malone to make their meals. Roxton saw they were pressed for time and Malone still had his meal to make, so he took the meat from the boar he caught and stuck it in the oven. Roasted boar would just have to be enough. Everyone knew that Malone was a great cook and that he could make a good meal out of almost anything. Malone made one of his specialties, Bush Chicken Arthur. He had spent many times in the kitchen with Summerlee and he was nice enough to share the recipe with him.

Once everyone had finished cooking their meals, they set them out and prepared for Assai and Jarl to come by and make their judging. Assai and Jarl started with Roxton's.

"Hmmm, very nice Lord Roxton. Your roasted boar is delicious." Jarl helped himself to another bite. "Yes, very good."

Assai had a taste as well, "Yes, most delicious."

They moved down to Challenger's stew. Jarl had a spoonful and coughed, but managed to swallow it. "That is a most, uh, interesting recipe for stew, Professor." Jarl tried to smile and moved onto Malone's as Assai stepped up to taste Challenger's.

Assai put the stew in her mouth and managed to swallow it with keeping a straight face. She smiled but didn't say anything as she moved onto Malone's meal.

Both Assai and Jarl had tasted Bush Chicken Arthur before, and were happy to get another taste. They both agreed, "This is most delicious, Malone. Good work." Assai smiled as both her and Jarl moved onto the ladies' dishes.

They tasted Veronica's raptor roast and Finn's baked bird, both delicious. They moved onto Marguerite's dish with trepidation. All of the Zanga knew how horrible a cook Marguerite was, her exploits were legendary. Jarl stood back and let his wife go first. Assai had a small taste of the soup and managed to keep it down. She didn't think she would ever taste a dish more horrible than Challenger's, but she was proven wrong when she tasted Marguerite's soup. Assai stepped back for Jarl to have a taste.

Jarl put the spoonful of soup in his mouth and swallowed. For a second, he didn't move. They all waited in suspense for his reaction. His eyes rolled back in his head, groaned, fell backwards.

"Oh my! Jarl!" Assai rushed to her husband's side.

"I guess we know who won this round." Finn looked down at Jarl. "I hope he ain't dead."

Jarl started to stir and Assai helped him to his feet. Marguerite looked at her friends. "I'm sorry, I didn't think it was going to be that bad."

"Do not worry, Marguerite. Jarl has always had a weak stomach." Marguerite gave Assai a meek smile, but she wasn't comforted. After she apologized to Jarl, Veronica and Finn, Marguerite congratulated the men on another victory and made her way to her room. She had had enough excitement for one day. Everyone else ate a little bit of the dinner they cooked, and went off to bed themselves.

- - - - - - - - - - - -

While Assai and Jarl decided on the final competition, tensions were high in the tree house for the past day. The women were behind one win and they knew they needed to win the next one, it was crucial to them. Even though it would only mean a tie, it was better than proving the men right in their unsupported belief that women were incapable and inferior.

"Jarl and I have decided your final event will be." Assai said.

"What is it?" Malone asked as he and the others gathered around the table.

"We have decided to make the last test one of intelligence. We will-"

"Well, we have Challenger! I think we all know how this will turn out." Malone looked triumphantly at Challenger and then Roxton.

"Malone, why don't you wait for Jarl to say what our task is before you go celebrate your victory." Veronica gave him a stern look and turned back to Jarl. "You were saying?"

"Yes, thank you, Veronica. Assai and I have picked out a Zanga saying, a…what did you call it again, dear wife?"

"A riddle." Assai said.

Jarl nodded. "Yes, a riddle. We translated it into English but the meaning will be the same. We will say it and whoever finds the right answer will win. Any questions?"

Both sides shook their heads. "All right then, Assai will say the riddle. Good luck to all of you."

Jarl stepped aside and let Assai come forward. She held up the piece of paper and read from it. "What can run but never walks, has a mouth but never talks, has a bed but never sleeps, and has a head but never weeps."

Malone and Roxton immediately turned to Challenger. "Come on, Challenger, work some magic." Roxton gave Challenger room to think. He saw he was mumbling to himself like he always did when he started thinking. Roxton looked over Malone's shoulder and saw the women in a huddle talking in hushed tones.

"Hey, Assai, is that all there is to it?" Finn popped her head up from the group. Assai nodded.

Finn ducked back into the huddle and started speaking in hushed tones again. "Ok, so what do we got so far?"

"Well, from the wording and the clues, I don't think it's a person. Probably something that's not alive. So, what fills all these clues?" Marguerite started whispering the riddle back to herself to see if she could try to figure it out.

Finn looked across the room at the men. "Well, we better hurry, once Challenger goes into deep thought mode like he is now, he usually figures stuff out."

"Well," Veronica tapped her foot as she thought, "this is the Zanga we're talking about. It has to be something about nature…"

"Nature, huh?" Finn watched both Marguerite and Veronica go off into another world concentrating on finding the answer.

"I got it!" They both exclaimed.

"You do?" They looked at each other and asked in unison.

"Stop that!" They shouted.

Finn stepped in between Marguerite and Veronica. "Ok, guys, why don't ya just say the answer instead?"

"It's a river." Once again, both Marguerite and Veronica spoke at the same time. After they glared at each other, Marguerite put up her hands and let Veronica talk.

Veronica explained it to Finn. "Once nature came up, the clues fit into place. A river runs, but it doesn't walk. There's of course, the mouth and head, and lastly the river bed. All the clues fit."

"What she said," Marguerite looked over her shoulder at Challenger and then back at Finn. "Hurry and go tell Assai. I haven't heard Challenger shout 'Eureka!' yet, so we should be fine."

Finn grinned and ran up to Assai and whispered the answer in her ear. Assai smiled brightly. "Can I have your attention please?"

Roxton and Malone tapped Challenger's shoulders and got him to stop pacing and muttering to himself long enough to pay attention to Assai.

"I am pleased to announce that the women have figured out the answer. Good job." Assai and Jarl both walked over to congratulate them personally.

"Excuse me? What was the answer?" Malone asked.

"The answer was a river, I mean, duh!" Finn answered.

"A river! Of course!" Challenger started mumbling again and fingering his beard.

"That was your next guess, right Challenger?"

Challenger heard his name and looked up. "What? Oh yes, yes, my next guess, Marguerite."

"Ok, the score's tied now, where's our tie breaker?" Finn started jumping around with excitement. "Come on, bring it on, we can do it!"

"Calm down, Finn. We don't need a tie breaker." Roxton laughed at Finn's antics.

Marguerite raised her eyebrow and looked at Roxton. "Oh really, Lord Roxton? Why is that?"

"Well during this whole competition, I've seen what I already knew. That the three women I share this tree house with are three of the most strongest, independent, and intelligent women I've ever met. I guess it was just the old fashioned upbringing talking, but I am very sorry. Can you ever forgive me?" By the end of his speech, Roxton had gotten closer and closer to Marguerite, until he was only a few inches from her face. Marguerite looked deeply into his eyes and saw the sincerity of his words. "I--"

"Sure, big guy!" Finn jumped in and gave Roxton a brotherly hug and without knowing it, ruined the moment. She turned and faced Malone. "What about you? You gonna say somethin'? Let me tell ya, you ain't toppin' that."

Malone gave Finn a brief glare. "I'll say sorry, I admit it. Sewing was not as easy as I thought it was, and I don't think that any of you are weaker than men."

"It really has nothing to do with gender, more with each individual. As you can all tell, I am not the best cook in the world, but we all know my place is in the lab." Challenger looked around at his friends. "Finn could not read when we first met her, but after steady lessons, she's well on her way. I'm sure if any of us men had picked up a needle and thread and learned how to sew, we could be as good at it as Marguerite is. We all do what we're best at, or are capable of doing."

Malone and Roxton nodded their heads in agreement. Malone smiled, "Forgive a fool who was caught in the moment?"

He was looking directly at Veronica but once again, Finn jumped in. "Ok, we forgive ya."

Marguerite leaned over to Veronica and whispered, "She's on a roll."

"Tell me about it." Veronica crossed her arms, but she really couldn't stay mad at Finn. Veronica watched as Finn was teasing Challenger about how 'hot' he looked in his dress. His face immediately turned red and started bumbling nervously.

Everyone thanked Assai and Jarl for helping them with the competition and invited them to stay for lunch before they went back to the Zanga village. "So who's cooking?" Malone asked. After everyone saw the look on his face and realized he was joking, they all had a good laugh. "You guys relax, I'll cook."

"Thanks, Malone." They all had a seat while Roxton and Challenger poured everyone a drink. After almost a week of competition, they could all use a little rest and relaxation.

THE END


End file.
